Can creative writing programs turn a crap writer into a professional, publishable writer?

No.

Surely if they are willing to learn, they may graduate to competent writers but most writers, who think they can string a sentence together, don’t want to learn.

Creative writing programs will molly coddle you along because the middle class PC teachers haven’t got the guts to tell you, you’re crap. The university or TAFE also want your money.

The best that can be said of creative writing programs is you get to hang out with other so-called apprentice creative writers, who given half a chance, won’t hesitate to tear your writing to shreds.

Surely, I jest?

Nope.

Crap writers just want someone to listen to their crap and to say nice things about it.

The person who admires her writing first and last is the writer herself.

Why then do creative writing teachers, teach creative writing?

Because 90 percent of their novels don’t sell.

They do it for the money and dubious status.

Suppose you follow the advice of teachers and study technique, subject matter, research, genre and form. Do you stop being bad?

No.

You must have the nous, intelligence and drive to turn your story into something people want to read.